It's quiet around here right now. Almost too quiet. I'm enjoying it though and am hoping it continues for a least a little while. Mike is out of town and the kids are all asleep. I'm in my room and the only thing I can hear are the crickets chirping outside and the ceiling fan whirling overhead. It's nice.
Life has been busy around here. It seems as if I don't get any time to just be quiet anymore. I know I need to take that time but it just seems to elude me. At home there is always something going on... it might be the baby needing to be changed or needing to be fed, a little one wanting to be held or to go outside and play, baths and school, arguments and wrestling matches, singing competitions and shows the kids put on for me, cooking and cleaning, writing for the Catholic Sistas. Of course if life was just at home we might be able to eek out some down time but life extends to other areas too... youth group, church, volunteering at the pregnancy resource center, helping friends, grocery shopping, doctor appointments, dance class, running errands, taking kids to where they need to be.
I'm glad we are so busy but there are times where I wish time would slow down for me. I want to read a book, crochet a blanket, watch a movie, take a bath, take a nap, snuggle with Mike for a little while. I know that there are definitely things I could do in my life to make things a little easier but it's hard to impliment those plans sometimes. It takes fortitude and determination to make changes and really, I'm tired.
Lately I've felt overwhelmed with life. I know part of it was having everything under the sun break on us at one time. It was so stressful. Still another struggle is with our friends losing their baby and what it has stirred in me. Of course another problem is just that I take on so much. I never say yes unless I truly want to help with something but sometimes there just isn't enough time to do it all. I don't know how to balance that all out. Maybe I don't change things because then I would lose some of those things that are important to me that would have to be put aside. I don't know.
I'm not sure why I'm writing a post about this here. I guess I just wanted to get it out. I'm not sure anyone reads here anymore anyway but like a dear friend said to me many, many years ago, "It just helps to write it all out. Just do it. You won't regret it." She is right. It helps to get it out of me, even if no one ever sees it but me.
If you are here and have read this, thanks for stopping by and thank you for reading. There are so many times through the day that I say to myself, "Oh! I should blog about that!" but the time gets away from me and by the time I actually can sit down I've forgotten what I wanted to write about anyway. I have many titles here in my line up of posts that I at least wrote a title for or perhaps even started but never finished. I sit and look at those and wonder what in the world I wanted to write about. It's frustrating.
Time keeps on ticking by and life keeps on marching forward. There are days I wish I could slow them down, maybe even stop them, but then I think about it and decide that even if I could I probably still wouldn't get everything done. I guess I'll just keep trying to do my best. Afterall, it's really all I can do.
2 comments:
still reading when I get round to sitting at laptop, but lately have been concentrating on me. My cancer came back and I've been beating it back with some surgery and chemo. On the other side now and slowly feeling human again... While I was bedbound found the ipad easier but it didn't have my favourites.. but am catching up and wishing I could give you a big hug and make that time for you to chill. Its why I have time now as I am on a break for a few weeks at the seaside convalescing. You do a great job, and I wish you lived down the road so I could come say hi.
Oh Noonie! I'm so sorry you are facing this again! I am praying so hard for you. I wish we lived close so I could help!
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